As we age, our ability to drive safely may change for many reasons. Those can include slower reaction times, vision or hearing loss, or even cognitive decline. It can be a tough situation for seniors and for their adult children. Driving represents independence for most adults, so conversations about safety can be deeply emotional and difficult.
For adult children and caregivers, approaching the topic requires empathy, respect, and a focus on shared goals: safety, independence, and dignity. In honor of National Older Driver Safety Awareness Week, let’s talk about some practical steps to help both seniors and their adult children collaboratively address transportation safety concerns.
Navigating Conversations About Senior-Driving Safety Together
Maintain Empathy and Respect
Whether you’re a senior or a concerned family member, it’s crucial to start the conversation with empathy and maintain it throughout the talk. Avoid becoming confrontational or issuing ultimatums, which will likely only result in defensiveness or resistance. Framing the conversation as a two-way dialogue encourages understanding and cooperation.
For adult children: Consider using “I” rather than “you” statements. For example, you could say “I’ve noticed a few dents on the car and I’m a little concerned. Can we talk about how you’re feeling behind the wheel lately?”
For seniors: It’s important to stay open to the conversation and remember that the concern comes from a place of love. Take time to honestly reflect on your own experiences. Are you feeling more anxious while driving? Do you avoid night driving or heavy traffic? Have you had an increasing number of close calls or fender benders?
Recognize the Signs That It’s Time to Talk
There are several signs that might indicate it’s time to assess driving abilities:
- Increased traffic tickets or warnings
- Frequent close calls or minor accidents
- Getting lost on familiar routes
- Difficulty staying in lanes
- Slower decision-making or delayed reaction times
- Dings and scrapes on the car’s fenders and doors
While these red flags don’t automatically mean the older adult must stop driving, they do warrant a conversation and possibly a professional driver-safety evaluation.
Create a Collaborative Safety Plan
Many times, the goal isn’t to stop driving. Instead, it’s to ensure safe driving. Working together, seniors and their families can create a plan that might include:
- Limiting driving to daylight hours or good weather
- Avoiding highways or busy intersections
- Not driving during rush hour or peak traffic times
- Having regular health checkups to monitor vision, hearing, and cognition
- Updating skills through senior-driving courses, such as those offered by AARP or local DMVs
- Exploring alternative transportation options like rideshares, community shuttles, or family carpooling
Putting the driving plan in writing helps everyone stay on the same page and can reduce the stress of uncertainty.
When and How to Involve Healthcare Providers
Healthcare providers can be a neutral, trusted voice in the conversation. The input of a doctor, an occupational therapist, or an optometrist may bring clarity and objectivity, especially if the senior is unsure or resistant.
Consider involving a trusted healthcare professional if the senior:
- Has a diagnosis that could impair driving (e.g., dementia, stroke, Parkinson’s, or vision loss)
- Takes medications that may affect alertness or coordination
- Has had a recent accident or near-miss incidents
You can ask the provider for a Comprehensive Driving Evaluation (CDE) or a referral to a Certified Driving Rehabilitation Specialist (CDRS). These evaluations focus on skills, not age. They typically result in recommendations ranging from no change needed to limiting driving times or stopping altogether.
Preserving Independence Beyond the Wheel
Hanging up the car keys for good doesn’t have to mean a senior will lose their independence. Many older adults worry about becoming isolated or reliant on others. It’s important to proactively discuss transportation strategies, such as:
- Access to grocery stores, doctors, and social activities
- Transportation apps and services the senior can learn to use
- Volunteer or community transport programs for seniors
It might also be a good time to discuss moving to an independent living or life plan community. These communities typically provide transportation services for physician appointments, shopping, and attending off-campus programs and activities.
We invite you to schedule a time at a PSL location near you to learn more about all the benefits of community life!
